November 12, 2008:
How interesting the simplicity in missing someone so much that (your blood flows through your veins in resistance to your resistance to not have this person in your life) you hardly notice how great the longing is.
When you do realize you will be overcome with emotion that you cannot properly title for it's much more than missing, longing, needing. It's sharp and immediate while painstakingly dull and commonplace.
How did you not notice this before? But surely it was always there, stuck to your ribs, padding along the soles of your feet, elongating your exhale ever so slightly.
And when this person enters your life once again (because they must; it is the nature of these palpitating things) you will be washed in a relief that your silent longing was not inappropriate at all, it was perhaps not strong enough for why weren't you so moved to do everything in your power and then some to bring this person back into your life? How were you so content in your longing? And are you satisfied now that the longing is worsening even while in their presence?
Because the inevitable that was not possible before this moment is drawing near. They will leave again. Yes, again.
July 1, 2009:
Ditto.
